The process of Sacred Weaving results in a lived integrity; that is a life where all of its components are integrated into the whole. Trinitarian weaving; pondering the various strands of Divine and human personhood.
At the 2024 Training Event Susan gathered all these strands into a Sacred Wholeness, embodied in an actual weaving!
Susan Gill has lived in different locations of our motu settling back into Canterbury six years ago. Her background is in community development. In some not-so-random way that led to ordained work in the Anglican church.
Recent ‘retirement’ means there is more time for whānau along with work in Supervision and Spiritual Direction. Susan enjoys many craft projects which bring her joy, as does walking, reading and spending time with people.
Susan-Gill-Trinitarian-WeavingNotes from Presentation:
The process of Sacred Weaving results in a lived integrity; that is a life where all of its components are integrated into the whole. Trinitarian weaving; pondering the various strands of Divine and human personhood. (to be read alongside slide show)
When I was asked to provide a weaving and then to speak at this conference, my response – holy sh … not worthy. All my insecurities kicked in. There is a pretty big long drop that resides in my brain!
So all of this year has been God telling me it’s okay Susan. You are okay Susan. You do actually have something to offer ….then I looked at the speaker list and freaked out all over again.
But I understand other speakers, people I esteem very highly indeed, may also have had a similar response – a much more polite than me of course – but still wondering about what we have to contribute in this setting.
Why do most of us wonder about our worth?
Why do we wonder if we have anything useful to contribute?
One of my spiritual learnings is that it is possible to know that I am deeply loved by God AND to feel deeply insecure at the same time.
Suggestions – in the light of Divine and Human personhood:
- Most of us feel inadequate at times – this is a good thing
- Godself is constantly weaving threads of goodness into our lives, especially among our ‘weaknesses’
- Our Sp D practice is enhanced when we are aware of our own weaknesses and of God’s eternal welcome
I know these suggestions are sooooo basic And yet they are soooo profound
I invite you to partner with me as we explore all this a little more this afternoon. It’s possible we may have time for questions at the end. Let’s see how we go.
God of honest prayers and
More honest silences,
Open our eyes to see and
Our ears to hear and
Our hearts to understand
How you are already here with us.
Let us find ourselves, interwoven in you.
Let’s ponder Human Personhood for a moment and then we’ll consider Divine person hood and then how we interweave together. How would you define human personhood?
As you’d suspect nothing is simple. Personhood is a controversial topic in philosophy and law. It’s closely tied with legal and political concepts of citizenship, equality, and agency. Only a legal person has rights, protections, privileges,
responsibilities, and legal liability.
In 2017, New Zealand granted legal personhood to the Whanganui River, making it the first river in the world to receive this status and so the river can act as a person in court, with legal rights, duties, and liabilities. Or at least the rivers two guardians can act in court on the rivers behalf.
To be a person it is said we must have consciousness, logical reasoning ability, self motivated activity, be able to communicate, and be self-aware. I don’t know what that means for human beings who are in a coma, or non-verbal or
totally narcissistic or …. So many exceptions to that definition and are the ones who don’t fit any less for that?
Most definitions talk about individuals and yet human personhood is not just an individual effort. Being made God’s image means we are woven into myriad of relationships; some meaningful, others trivial, some even harmful. Our relationships with Godself, with other humans, with animals, and with creation itself are all part of what makes us human persons.
And our personhood is shaped by our childhood for better or for worse …. Pretty much all our insecurities come from things we perceived we were lacking, not necessarily lacking but we felt they were lacking… for me it was unconditional love. My parents were busy trying to survive and I seldom felt noticed let alone valued or loved. You will have your own insecurities.
Sure we know we are all made in God’s image – but what does that mean?
Ideally we reflect God’s nature and character, and even represent Godself in creation. Sounds good eh! But clearly we don’t ONLY reflect God’s image but also our own wounds and failings. Sometimes those are the things that jump out to us and to others.
Is it sinful to be a mix, to bear God’s image, and to be less than perfect? We’ve been told that it is. But yeah, nah, I’m not so sure.
Jesus carries his wounds into his resurrection life. Those wounds speak volumes of what he endured to bring about fullness of life and restoration. Jesus’ wounds are a vital part of who Jesus is. I reckon our wounds also speak volumes about us. They have shaped us into who we are now as adults. My childhood means I am insecure yes, but it also means I am on the lookout for people on the fringe, people who are excluded, and I try to include them when I can.
Even our weaknesses, are not in themselves, sinful. Sure, if we give in to them, we can commit actions that cause harm to ourselves and others. That is sin. But the weaknesses themselves, aren’t sin. They are pointers to our own human need. And they too, make us who we are.
I think that our weaknesses, as much as our strengths, maybe even more, make us who we are as human persons and in fact, it’s very often our weaknesses that allow meaningful interweaving with others and with the Divine.
I’m going to play a little song about weaving and invite you to ponder your own human personhood for a moment. You, like me, are a mixture of strengths and weaknesses, gifts and insecurities, talents and wounds. So ponder your own personhoold and to reflect on some of the ways your humanity interweaves with others and with the Divine.
Ok, let’s briefly consider Divine Personhood and then look at how the Human and Divine intertwine.
Divine Personhood
How do we begin to describe the person of God? Somehow I always believed in God in spite of never going to church or anyone specifically teaching me. I might have done one holiday program a couple of days. My grandparents were Christians though. Don’t remember them talking about God. I do remember they didn’t smoke or drink, at least when their church friends were around. Otherwise they did.
So my thoughts of God were of some boring old killjoy. I didn’t understand that God and I wasn’t ready to follow that God. And I had no other name for the divine apart from ‘God’. Names are important aren’t they? In the Bible names often say meaningful things about the person who is named.
The various names of God describe something of the nature and character, the personhood, of God. Alpha and omega, Lord, God who provides etc Jesus invited us to call Godself Abba. That was revolutionary. And Jesus himself generated a whole bunch of names like Immanuel, Christ, Son of Man, all of these teach us something about God and how Godself relates to humanity.
And then there is the understanding that Godself is somehow a unified being, made up of three divine persons. Our Christian ancestors developed, played with, opened up a world of the Trinitarian God. Very wise and sometimes confusing, theologians have made given many names to persons within the Trinity. Some of those names are Biblical and others not so much. As I said, names do matter. They reflect our understanding of reality.
So let’s think for a moment of some of those names. What names for the persons within the Trinity resonate with you?
Father, Son, Spirit – emphasising personal relationships
Mother, lover, friend – feminist names that also focus on relationships
Creator, Redeemer, Giver of Life – participating in the actions of God
Fount (or Spring), river and stream – St John of the cross envisions how we can be immersed in the living water 1
And then …. Wm Paul Young. The Shack blew many of our preconceived ideas:
Papa: The African-American woman who represents God the Father
Jesus: The Middle-Eastern man who is one of the more accurate depictions of Jesus , as opposed to the blond haired, blue eyed variety we often see
Sarayu: The Asian woman who represents the feminine Holy Spirit and shimmers beautifully
If the Trinitarian members are relationships, or even actions (just hold that thought) then descriptors might be sending, obeying, glorifying Within the Trinity many theologians have talked about Divine Persons. Perhaps that’s been your understanding too.
God wasn’t going to leave me ignoring Godself and getting on with my own life; messing up my own life really: When I was 17 I met Jesus. I’d never before experienced unconditional love but Jesus revealed himself to me as just that – pure love, love for me, in me, woven through me. And I was completely overwhelmed. For three days I could hardly do
anything but revel in that love.
Later again I experienced the Holy Spirit in a dynamic and powerful way and so, I grew to know God as Father, Son and Holy Spirit ….
In the last couple of decades I learned other names for God and God’s Trinitarian nature has began to mean a lot more to me. So much so that I got my first, and probably only, tattoo. You’ve probably seen this celtic image before. While it can mean many things it represents Trinity to me.
I love the flow and colour the tattoo artist created. For me the most important aspect is that of this constant interweaving and movement, the invitation to be part of the weaving and the weaver that God is.
When I die, I’m asking for my arm to be placed across my chest so the symbol can rest on my heart – before the worms or flames get it anyway.
There are other ways to think of the Triune God. Gregory of Nazianzus: ‘Father’ is not a name for being but for the relationship between ‘Father’ and ‘Son. Hmmm, Trinity as centres of relationship. One term for relationships within Godself is perichoresis. Perichoresis, or mutual indwelling/permeation, reflects the ultimate unity and harmony within the Godhead.
David Cunningham talks of ‘participation’ meaning the same thing. He focuses on our human need to participate in Trinity. 2 I like to think of being interwoven with God’s Trinitarian self. Who else loves the idea of dynamic, intertwined relationships within Godself – relationships that allow space and mutuality, respect and intimacy, distinctiveness
and interdependence?
So is Trinity made up of persons or relationships?
Others talk of Trinity as being action. The emphasis is on God’s active involvement in the world and in human history and on our own participation in God’s work. We’re invited to embody God’s love, justice, and compassion in our own actions. Our actions in the world are part of God’s actions in the world. If the Trinity is actions, then faith is not just belief or creeds or head knowledge but a call to live out God’s mission in tangible ways.
Paul Fiddes gives an example of God in action – (43) When we bless in the name of Father, Son and Spirit, we make hand movements as we sign the cross. We are blessing others or ourselves – maybe both. Making the sign recalls the self-sacrificial love embodied freely on the cross and, is the part I want to stress, it isn’t just an acknowledgement of a past event, it’s a visible demonstration of love in movement.
Fiddes goes on to say: As we make the movement perhaps the vertical sweep portrays the relation from Father to Son, while the sideways movement cuts across this, reminding us of the Holy Spirit who is always opening up the relationships to new depths and a new future.
Fun fact: Holding your hand with three fingers together represents the Trinity and the other fingers represent the two natures of Christ. Who knew? Perhaps many of you….
Thinking of God as persons, relationships or actions are of course not mutually exclusive. Perhaps all these ways may be considered as aspects or characteristics of the personhood of God. I have related to different strands or aspects of Godself at different times of my life. As my needs have varied so God has presented herself to me in various guises to
meet those needs, to bring challenge when I need it and to effect growth and change in me.
Reflection moment: How does pondering or worshipping the Trinitarian God as persons, relations, and /or actions affect your relationship with Godself? How might it impact your directees?
Ok, we’ve touched on human and divine personhood – barely scratched the surface actually but anyway, now I want to dive into the intertwining of God and us humans, how we weave together.
First a reminder – for us and for those we work with:
Fiddes again 45: Whatever names we use, the relationships within the Trinity are marked by ‘such an excessive love overflowing to draw created persons in.”
“Excessive love;” not conditional love. God’s love doesn’t need us to earn it. Divine love is not meted out as a reward for good behaviour, nor for cultivating characteristics that others find palatable. That’s for Enneagram 2s
1 John 4:
16 We know how much God loves us because we have felt this love and because we believe it when he tells us that she loves us dearly. Do we? God is love, and anyone who lives in love is living with God and God is living in them.
17 And as we live with Christ, our love grows more perfect and complete; so we will not be ashamed and embarrassed at the day of judgment, but can face God with confidence and joy because she loves us and we love him too.
18 We need have no fear of someone who loves us perfectly…
I need reminding frequently: Whatever understanding we have of the persons, or relationships, or actions that exist within Godself, however we understand God, the most important understanding, knowing way down deep in the centre of our being, for us and for our directees, is that this God is always reaching out to us in love.
While the Trinitarian God is complete within Godself, somehow God longs for us to be woven into the wonder of Divine grace.
Some years ago in Nelson, on a retreat for the then Bishop’s team, we were asked as a warm up, what our favourite song was. When I said, “U2’s, I still haven’t found what I’m looking for” an appalled look came over a couple of faces. Aren’t you a Christian already; don’t you have Jesus now? What more could you want?
It’s still my favourite song. I still long for more of God; for a greater vision of who God really is. That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy God now. Okay maybe I should be satisfied but I’m not. I’m sure there is more.
Colossians 2:2 “I want you woven into a tapestry of love, in touch with everything there is to know of God”. I don’t know everything of God yet – far from it.
And maybe this is completely fanciful, you decide, but what if the Divine One in Three hasn’t found what they are looking for either?
Fiddes again: God is not content to be self-sufficient and in this divine discontent we can see the work of the Spirit, the provoker, the innovator, the opener of the future, the divine joker in the pack.
Fiddes 95 Ok all the lyrics don’t totally line up, but I invite you, as you listen, to ponder the question: what if God is longing for more of you? What if God wants not just my shiny best self but all of me, maybe the stuff that I keep private too; even the stuff out in the long drop?
Let’s pause, listen to the song, and hear God’s longing for each one of us. What do you hear God say?
We are loved and longed for…
And we are known intimately by the Master Weaver. Wherever it’s written in the Bible that God knit us together, the translation could just as easily be God wove us together. That is true of Ps 139:3 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and wove them together in my mother’s womb. and Job 10:11 where God has given us skin and and flesh and woven together bones and sinews.
I love the image of God as a Master Weaver – and of us as Co-weavers. Remember we are always invited to partner the Living God in her work.
Let’s look at Ecclesiastes for some specific insight into weaving. Often in marriage ceremonies the passage about the 3 fold cord is read out. Usually the first bit is missed out of course – the bit about how working hard to gain wealth is a waste of time when when there’s no one to pass the riches on to.
Ecclesiastes 4:9 Two can accomplish more than twice as much as one, for the results can be much better. 10 If one falls, the other pulls him up; but if a man falls when he is alone, he’s in trouble. 11 Also, on a cold night, two under the same blanket gain warmth from each other, but how can one be warm alone? 12 And one standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer; three is even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.
It’s logical right. Actually the passage is about working together in business but it works for marriage too. In a marriage ceremony the cord is said to be the two spouses and Godself. That’s good.
But the passage could mean something else too. What if we flip that a bit? There’s no Biblical basis for what I imagine the cord might be but there ya go. So… what if the cord was God, our known self and our unknown self, or our shadow side or our weaknesses? (Actually sometimes our shadow side contains a lot of strength that we can’t acknowledge for whatever reason.)
What if God wants to be interwoven with all of us? What if God loves all of us so much that our whole selves truly can be integrated with Godself? Perhaps it means more if we choose to allow God to interweave our wounds and our flaws too? If we are aware, or becoming aware of some of those things, perhaps the cord, the weaving is actually strengthened?
Three is even better – a triple braided cord is not easily broken.
What do you think God’s most important job is? Creating the universe? Bringing world peace? Feeding those in need? Bringing justice for indigenous people. Repairing and restoring this beautiful terrible world?
Insert your own gigantic task for God here!!
Yes, yes and yes. But I wonder if God’s biggest task of all is: Getting us to know just how intimately we are woven with Godself and know that we are truly loved – all of us, strengths and challenges, preferences and avoidances – all of us.
What if our biggest task is to know that for ourselves? And what if our biggest task as Sp Ds is to partner with our Directees in that too?
Often the most valuable part of Spiritual Direction is simply having someone listen with positive unconditional regard. Our job is to listen to our directees and create a space where they know they are loved by us and by God. In the Spiritual Direction place you could even say that the three-fold cord is the directee, the director and Godself.
A directee – what is wrong with me that I am still insecure? That criticism still throws me? My directee is in her late 30s. I am 68years old still the same. I don’t think there is anything wrong with my directee. For most of us it’s a lifelong
journey getting to know that we are truly loved by the Triune God. It’s a lifelong journey allowing ourselves to be interwoven and welcomed into Godself – imperfect as we are.
One last story: a few weeks back I was hanging out with my 11 year old granddaughter. We were talking about body image – different shapes and sizes. She talked about her shape (lean) and we talked about how some in our family, the
girls only for some genetic mystery, seem to put on weight in their teenage years. I told her that used to be called puppy fat, she thought that was hilarious, and that it just drops off by itself at the right time.
Then I rather unhelpfully said “My roundness comes from middle age spread.” Or words to that effect. My granddaughter paused, she looked into my eyes, and she said “You are just perfect.”
Imagine that! She thinks I am just perfect. And as she said it, I truly felt it was more than my granddaughter speaking. I felt like those words “You are just perfect came right from the heart of God.”
Now I know I’m not. And God is not blind. And there are times when I need to be challenged in order to cooperate with God’s transformation process in my life.
However, all that said, I wonder if God truly does choose to see us as perfect, at least in some given moments, in moments when we are our worst critic or others are being mean or the only love we’ve ever received is conditional love. What if from time to time God breaks through all of that and whispers “You are just perfect”.
Perhaps God is weaving self-love into the tapestry of our lives along with God’s own love for us.
In Summary….
So, beloved human persons, let’s continue to have open eyes so we can see how God is weaving in the various beautiful threads of our human personhood. Let’s continue to weave with God as we discover the strands of God’s personhood, God’s ways of being and interacting with us, loving us, weaving with us, something messy, something beautiful – something as yet unfinished.
Let’s enable our Directees to do the same and sit with them as they willingly enter the Vibrant relationship, the mutual intertwining, the tapestry and celebration that is Godself.
Atua Whaea, Mother God, gather us as
A hen gathers her chicks
And let us catch our breath
For one hot second and remember
How you hold the whole world
In your kind, capable, wise hands,
Including us.
Brother Jesus, we are grateful for
(Mostly) every moment
That brought us here
To you.
Help us to sink down into your Love
To weave our lives with yours
Secure within your grace and mercy
As we practice loving this world as you have
Loved this world.
Wairua Tapu, when we cannot separate the warp nor weft
Of our own traditions and old languages,
When our weaving feels like a mess of knots
Would you help us untie the tangles
For us to find new ways to thread,
New practices, new permissions
To simply be ourselves?
May we learn to sit with you at the loom,
And know it is enough to know you,
And be known by you,
And know ourselves.
The truth of our belovedness,
Of your justice, of your faithfulness,
Of arohanui.
And say
Āmine.
Let it be so, let it be in us, let it be in our Directees.
